Squirt Bible

She really does – and for good reason. In case you were wondering, the foreskin is a stretchy piece of skin that covers the head of the penis and its functionality is two-fold: protection and sex. When a baby boy is born, the foreskin is fused to the penis. By the age of 10, the foreskin will begin to detach (or may have already detached) and serves as a protective sleeve.

The foreskin is internally composed of mucous membranes that aid in maintaining natural lubrication and protects erotic nerve endings to prevent overexposure and desensitization. The foreskin contains 240 feet of nerve fiber and over 20,000 nerve endings. So if the foreskin has all these great uses and attributes, why does our society promote cutting it off? 8 out of every 10 Americans are circumcised. Worldwide the statistic is 3 out of 10 people.

Circumcision is the practice of cutting off the top half of a male’s foreskin and dates back 2400 BC. Many tribal cultures still use circumcision as a right of passage into manhood. A major reason the practice has survived into modern times is through religion, however, Laci sites 4 main arguments for the validity of modern circumcision:

1. It’s just cleaner that way! – Not true, says Laci. The foreskin isn’t inherently dirty and extremely easy to clean.

2. Circumcision protects against STD’s! – While research is divided on this claim, something that is less extreme than slicing off half of the skin on your penis is the use of condoms which provides 99% protection against disease.
3. Circumcised penises look nicer – There is nothing ugly about a natural penis.

4. His dad is circumcised so we got him done too – Some traditions don’t have to be continued!
Sometimes as circumcised men get older they begin to realize that infant circumcisions are not right and regret their parent’s decision to tamper with their body. Because it was done without consent it can feel like a violation. Laci recommends some healthy ways of dealing with these feelings.

What is the difference between a fantasy and a desire? Chris from Pleasure Mechanics has an answer: a fantasy lives in the domain of your imagination where anything and everything is possible, especially the improbable and impossible. Desires are what you actually want to experience more of in real life. Most of the time we don’t have trouble discerning the difference between real life and imagination. Humans are good at fantasizing, and fantasizing is good for humans. The act of fantasizing alone can cause full body pleasure stimulation.

Sometimes people can be troubled with moral issues due to their fantasies. They think that because they are dreaming about an intense sexual situation that they are perverted or sadistic. These kinds of fantasies are completely normal and have no bearing on who you are as a person. Once you begin to yearn for something in actuality it is no longer a fantasy.

Fantasies can sometimes make their way into the realm of desire, and that’s ok. There is still a difference between fantasy and real life. Your fantasy might include being kidnapped and tied up while in real life you are just desiring rougher sex. The capacity to identify your desires and distinguish them from your imagination is a powerful thing.

Identify your fantasies. Identify your desires. Understand the difference between the two and communicate them with your partner.

Tracey Cox is a former Cosmopolitan magazine editor turned relationship and sex expert. In this video, she answers several commonly asked sex questions.

According to a recent survey, one-third of women and two-thirds of men are not satisfied with their sex lives. Tracey explains that usually what people mean when they say they aren’t satisfied with their sex lives is the quantity of sex. Men and women have the same libidos, but there are many reasons why women tend to want sex less than men. Women tend to stretch themselves too far, involve themselves in too many activities and therefore have less energy. Another reason is the likelihood of an orgasm isn’t grounds for motivation. While almost all men orgasm every time they have sex with their partner, only 30% of women orgasm every time. Women tend to need an emotional connection before engaging in sexual activities while men prefer to have their sexual needs met before seeking an emotional connection.

50% of both men and women are concerned that their partners are not satisfied with their sex lives. Tracey blames television and media where sex in committed relationships is portrayed inaccurately causing people to question the voraciousness of their own sex life.

50% of men and women would like to be more adventurous in bed. 1 in 4 women would like to act out a fantasy in the bedroom but 60% haven’t told their partner the details of their fantasies. Tracey believes that fantasies are sometimes best kept to yourself as they can be confused with real desire. Saying “I want to..” in regards to experimenting sexually instead of “I have been fantasizing about..” can save your relationship undue distress.

44% of women and 22% of men say that body confidence affects their sex lives. Tracey is surprised the women’s statistic isn’t higher due to the societal pressures from the media but also surprised that the men’s statistic is so high. There was a time that a man would not have refused sex due to body issues which just shows how intense societal pressure has become.

80% of women admit that they never instigate sex with their partner. Tracey explains how this can be detrimental to your relationship. The one who is always asking for sex can end up feeling like they are harassing or pressuring their partner and the partner can begin to feel harassed or pressured resulting in neither feeling sexy or in the mood.

Watch the full video here:

In this video, Shan Boodram interviews lesbian couple Amber and Kiarra to answer some common questions and convey some sexual wisdom.

The most common inquiry into Amber and Kiarra’s sex life as lesbians is, “How does it work?”. Lesbian sex is not some magical ceremony. Tiny fairies do not light the room with twinkling lights, mermaids do not serenade them with their siren song and a unicorn is not seen braying majestically and galloping into the sunset. That would be fucking awesome, but alas. Amber describes lesbian sex as completed foreplay. So for heterosexual partners, this would consist of common foreplay activities completed through to orgasm instead of eventually leading to penetration.

Something that surprises Amber and Kiarra is hetero women’s acceptance of not orgasming every time they have sex with a guy. In a lesbian relationship that just. does. not. happen. Psst: that’s the whole point of sex – get you some.

If you were ever curious about terms used in lesbian relationships, wonder no more. A “stud” is a more masculine looking lesbian. A “fem” is a feminine looking lesbian. Put those together and you get a “stem”, a combination of both feminine and masculine traits. Kiarra adds “pillow princess” to the list. You are a pillow princess if you lay there and receive pleasure rather than give it. And finally, “gold star lesbians”, which are women who have only ever been with women.

Amber has some advice for the guys, and it is simple: CLIT CLIT CLIT. Go down. Always. Lots. More. Do it. Keep motion consistent for best results.

Kiarra is here to impart some wisdom to her fellow lesbian women: Aggression is sexy. Try to find a little bit of boldness in the bedroom and take control. Also, don’t be intimidated if your partner is into penetration. That has nothing to do with being straight or gay, that has to do with having a vagina that likes to be penetrated.

For those of you with sexual curiosities, Amber says let go fo that fear and just go for it. You’ll never know until you try.

Check out the full video here:

So how effective is pulling out, really? Laci Green breaks it down statistically.

For couples that use the pull-out method accurately every single time they have sex, 4 out of 100 couples become impregnated. So the pull-out method has the potential to be almost 96% effective as a form of birth control. REALITY CHECK: the pull-out method’s actual success rate is 73%. That means that 1 out of every 4 couples that use the pull-out method will get pregnant.

The issue is that if used correctly, the pull-out method can be reasonably effective, but the majority of people are not committing to this execution 100% of the time.

The first mistake that people make is mishandling the pre-ejaculate or “pre-cum”. Pre-cum is fluid excreted from the Cowper’s gland that is used by the body to neutralize the urethra to ensure sperm survival and lubrication for smooth spermy sailing. Pre-cum does not naturally contain any actual sperm, but it can acquire sperm leftover from previous ejaculations as it travels through the urethra. Laci recommends peeing before sex to help clear the urethra of rogue sperm.

The second mistake is timing. It actually takes a lot of experience and self-control to pull-out at the moment of orgasm. It sounds like a simple concept but some can get caught up in the ecstasy at the last second and.. oops.

The third mistake is ejaculating on the outside of the vagina. Ejaculation near or on the vulva can still get your partner pregnant. Sperm are in it to win it and will find a way to get where they need to go.

Laci recommends the pull-out method for committed, monogamous couples who have been mutually tested for STI’s and have a lot of trust in each other. She does not recommend the pull-out method for new couples, those who are sexually inexperienced or those who have not been tested for STI’s.

Watch the full video here:

So, as everyone knows, all relationships begin with a honeymoon period. During this time everything is new and exciting; everything is all sex and cuddling and exorbitant affection. This phase usually lasts between 6 months to 2 years. The conclusion of this phase usually comes with some feelings of stagnation.

Some will feel themselves becoming less excited to engage in sexual activity with their partner and sometimes wondering what it would be like to sleep with someone else. These feelings are normal. Over the course of time, the repetition a committed relationship provides is comforting – but not necessarily a turn on. Human beings crave spontaneity and mystique. Your feelings of love for your partner are stronger than ever, but sexually it’s a snore fest – what do you do?

What you are feeling is actually a biological reaction called hedonic adaptation. Hedonic adaptation is the propensity for humans to adapt to life after change occurs and return emotionally to baseline happiness. The brain’s reaction to repetition of a stimulating event is gradually met with less and less dopamine, making you less likely to actively seek that kind of stimulus.

Get that spark back in your relationship! Things like roleplaying and introducing toys are common ways to spice up a boring sex life, but it’s not just sexual activities that can reinvigorate your romance. Share experiences together – travel, take a class, work-out. Try to venture outside your comfort zone and get to know your partner from a new perspective.

The honeymoon phase includes A LOT of time spent together. Remember: absence makes the heart grow fonder. Make sure you are still an independent entity. It is healthy for a couple to spend time apart.

Learn how to put the spark back into your committed sex life and watch the full video here:

If you watch one video today, make it this one. Take some notes ladies and gentlemen. These are the top 7 sex mistakes that both men and women make in the bedroom! Any of these sound familiar?

Shan Boodram sits down with her good friend and former colleague Chris Thompson to ask – what mistakes are people making that detriment their sex lives? Here are some tips from Chris:

Men:
Foreplay is NOT an option. Just because you’re ready to go, doesn’t mean she is! Take your time, get on the same level and then get atter’.

Mistake #2 – Foreplay for stimulating your partner both physically and mentally. Don’t just pleasure her body, her mind needs attention too. Women’s ability to achieve orgasm is heavily based on something she can visualize or conceptualize mentally.

Finally, don’t focus too much on one particular area of a woman’s body. He compares this to continually rubbing your arm in one spot. Eventually, it’s going to feel uncomfortable. Chris suggests switching it up. Shan’s rebuttable is, however, that sometimes men can have too much going on at the same time. Striking an appropriate balance between keeping it interesting and ensuring it feels good is key.

Women:
Don’t be a limp noodle. Be an active participant! Having a vagina and “letting” a man do his thing in it is NOT a turn on. Your partner wants to know that you are enjoying yourself and that you care about whether or not he is too!

When it comes to oral sex, if you don’t enjoy doing it – don’t bother. Oral is about putting your partner’s pleasure over your own and is an extremely intimate act. Guys can tell when you are doing it out of obligation.

Here is Chris’ advice on hand jobs: just don’t. Unless your partner tells you he really, really likes them, steer clear. This is the main way men masturbate. Men are handjob experts, but not connoiseurs. They are looking for something different from you.

Chris’ last piece of information regarding women’s sex mistakes is this: Listen to your partner’s intent. If you are looking for a relationship and he says that your association will remain purely sexual, don’t have sex with him. You will not hook a guy with sex. You may have a short-lived fling, but it most likely won’t turn into anything long-term.

Watch the full video here:

If you’ve been following along, you’ll know that we have reached part 3 of our 3 part exploration of anal play. We have learned how to prep ourselves and our partner and how to execute the act when trying it out for the first time. Today we will learn about how to maintain a healthy anus.

Maintaining a healthy butthole is important, especially if anal play becomes a regular part of your sexy time routine. You’ll remember the basic anatomy of the anus from the first video: 2 sphincters, the inner controlled by the autonomic nervous system while the outer is yours to clench and unclench as you please.

Step 1 to keeping a clean butthole is to eat healthily. Since the anus is the escape route for digested food, the healthier the food you eat, the healthier the anus will be. Healthy-butt foods include whole grains, beans, veggies and fruit, dried fruit and nuts. Non-healthy-butt foods include dairy, bananas (who knew?), junk food and red meat.

Step 2 is *drumroll please* wash your ass! A bidet attachment for your toilet seat or flushable baby wipes will keep you clean and fresh after every bowel movement. In the shower, all that is needed is a rinse of soap and water. Some people actually use anal douches for a “deep clean”, but it is important to remember that the anus, like the stomach and the mouth, contains healthy bacteria. Douching will remove this bacteria.

If you have watched the entire series of videos and anal play has become a mainstay in your sexytime routine, then invest some time in Step 3: Kegel exercises. A Kegel is a manual tightening and loosening of pelvic muscles. These exercises if performed regularly can maintain tightness in both the vagina and anus.

Step 4 is to drink lots of water! Water intake keeps you from becoming constipated. If you are properly hydrated, your bowel movements should be firm and smooth. If they tend to be hard or painful, your butthole can sustain tearing which can lead to infection. If you notice soreness in your anal area, move onto Step 5: Schedule an appointment. A medical professional will take a peek between your cheeks and make sure everything is ok in there.

Prevent anal tearing by keeping it moisturized. Step 6 recommends a layer of coconut oil rubbed directly on the anus daily which has anti-fungal properties. Anal play, however, requires something more slippery. Dr. Doe recommends investing in a high-quality water or silicone based lube.

Step 7: Wear condoms. Participation in anal play increases the likelihood of this transmission by 30% due to the anus being very absorbent. This partition between the skin (or toy) and the anus will decrease the transmission of sexual diseases.

If you experience anal discomfort, step 8 recommends that you take baths! A 10-20 minute bath per day will soothe irritation and increase circulation to your nether regions. If you aren’t a bath person, even a quick Sitz bath can help ease soreness. Add some baking soda or Epsom’s salt and soak in hip depth water for 5 minutes or so. This combination relieves a number of conditions such as constipation, diarrhea, and hemorrhoids.

Dr. Doe concludes that even if you don’t regularly engage in anal play, it’s still important to take care of your butthole! You only have one!

Find part 1 of this series here and part 2 here

Welcome to part 2 of our 3 part series on anal play. Yesterday we learned how to properly prepare yourself or your partner. Today we will continue with how to proceed with anal sex.

While deciding to try anal sex, schedule a backup plan. There is no reason to rush this experience, so take the pressure off each other and arrange another time to figure things out if the first time is a bust. Decide upon a safeword and choose an insertable item (penis, toy, finger). The item you should be using during your first time should be about the same size of your regular bowel movement. If you took the time to prepare for anal play as described in the first video, you can base the size of your insertable item off this preparation. The goal is to match the feeling of “out” to the feeling of “in” as closely as possible.

Now, wrap it up! Whatever you are using, you need protection. For a penis or a toy, condoms, and for hands, medical gloves or finger dams. This protection not only guards you against contracting diseases, but they smooth the edges of your insertable item. Your anus is a very sensitive organ. This smoothing prevents the anus from focusing on the edges and allows it to focus purely on pleasure.

Next, get into a comfortable position for insertion. For those of you with vaginas, ensure that your position allows for the lube to drift away from the vulva as contact can cause infection. Press the object, unlubed, lightly against the anus and wait for it to pucker. If you start out lubed, the anus will perceive this moisture as leakage and clamp shut. Once given the go ahead, lightly coat the item in high-quality anal lube and press it up against the anus again and wait for it to pucker a second time. Slowly insert the item a short ways inside the anal opening. Allow the anus to adjust to the feeling and then begin moving the item ensuring both partners are relaxed and enjoying themselves.

If you are using a toy, make sure it has a base wider than your anus or a cord you can hold on to so it doesn’t get lost or stuck.

Now, anal doesn’t always require such care and preparation. It is something that can happen spontaneously when you are in the moment. But if you are the type of person who needs some foresight before trying something new, this video is extremely detailed and educational.

Watch the full video here:

This post begins a three video exploration into the wonders of anal play. The inaugural video in this series is an extremely informative explanation of how to prepare yourself and your partner for anal play.

There are two different types of anal play – inner and outer. If you are diving into the art of inner anal sexy time, you need a basic understanding of how the anus is composed. Inside the anus are two muscular rings called sphincters. The inner ring is controlled by the autonomic nervous system which also controls your breathing and heartbeat. It functions automatically and is usually tightly contracted unless it is loosening for a bowel movement. The outer ring is what you feel when you clench and unclench and is completely controlled by you.

So why are we as humans interested in inserting things into our anuses? Well, just like the genitals, the anus and surrounding area is packed with nerve endings making it extremely sensitive. The anus and gentials share a main nerve, the pudendal nerve to be exact, and can transfer sensations back and forth. The anus is also an easy access to both the male and female prostates. Stimulating the prostate gland from inside the anus can result in orgasm without any other stimulation. Another good thing about anal play is that it is gender and sexual orientation neutral – everyone has an anus! (Almost everyone, deeply sorry if you don’t).

So how does one prepare for beginning anal play? The first thing Dr. Doe recommends you do is to eat whole seeds and watch the toilet for them to reappear. This will help you get acquainted with your body. From this you can gauge how long it takes food to pass through your body. Monitoring the toilet regularly can help you assess the foods you eat in regards to smell and consistency of what you pass. If you are going to participate in anal play, you want this area to be fresh as a daisy.

Dr. Doe recommends running through this checklist before engaging in anal play:

1. Hepatitis A and HPV vaccinations: Hepatitis is most commonly transmitted through fecal matter entering the mouth; HPV is the virus that initiates vaginal and anal cancers and can be transmitted through anal intercourse.
2. STI testing results: Anal sex presents the highest risk of transmittal of HIV.
3. Flushable baby wipes: Quick and easy solution to keeping your butthole fresh and clean on a regular basis.
4. Invest in a 1 handed lube pump: This prevents contamination from the designated play hand.
5. Gloves and condoms: Stay Safe! Anal play increases the risk of disease transmittal, so wrap up!
6. Safe words: “Stop” is pretty self explanatory but it is always a good idea to communicate effectively when it comes to your pleasure.

When you have completed the check list, its time to explore. While cleaning yourself in the shower, feel it out. Get familiar with your situation. If you have longer nails, trim them down before experimenting with penetration. Remember to breathe and only continue as long as it is comfortable for you. Dr. Doe says any uncomfortable feelings should pass after 3 attempts, so attempt away!